Tuesday 26 June 2007

Me, My Life, & I

Over time, having surveyed the Bebo pages of innumerable friends and random folk alike, I have reached a questionable theorem, which is as follows... There are but five ways of tackling the perpetually tricky Me, My Life, And I section.

1. THE COMEDIC ONE-LINER INTRODUCTION
A sarcastic, surrealist, obvious, or (tragically) unfunny pinch of whimsy designed to quickly entice the vast swathes of wanton Bebo whores that pass through.

2. THE PERSONAL/HEARTFELT/OPEN APPROACH
Adopted only by females, or 13 year olds. Or both.

3. THE ESOTERIC RAMBLE
A course of action utilised by this very individual in the past. Advisable only to those capable of providing dexterous recompense via the art of aimless shitehawking.

4. QUOTATIONS FROM FILM/TV/SONG/POETRY/SCRIPTURE
Utilised only by the true dullard. Simple, but not effective. However, rare exceptions are to be found and are orgasmic in wallop. Irony is advisable.

5. THE "WRITE NOTHING AT ALL" MERCHANT
Social retards. Should fuck off back to the abyss.

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